Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2006-09-18 03:21:37 (UTC)

New and Improved, More Centered and Balanced Me

****

"It is vital for a leader to keep in touch with the common
people. I myself had learned at an early age that anyone
who wishes to lead must remain close to the common people."

I had such a perfectly brilliant day. It didn't start out
that way, so I'm only giving it 4*'s, but it was still
great for the most part. I turned it around before it
could go South on me.

I was forced from my slumber around 6:30am, becuase Kiki
decided it was time to get up and refused to play quietly
in her crib. Honestly, I didn't know she got up that early
on the weekend, because she usually plays quietly until at
least 8am (that's when she eats breakfast during the week,
that doesn't change on weekends, either). So, I was up
with her (even though I didn't go to bed until after 2am)
and that didn't help my disposition much. I thought for
sure my day would be crap. Thankfully, after eating
breakfast at 8am, Kiki went down for a nap and while she
slept I slept, too. Annie read a book next to me, so I
could keep tabs on her. I'm always a little concerned that
she's going to lose her mind and burn the house down when
I'm not paying attention.

After mid-morning nap time, I made us some more of my
fabulous banana buckwheat pancakes (Kiki had two
breakfasts, because she's a little piggy). Then at that
point I just sat around wondering what to do next. I was
starting to get bored, even though I knew I had laundry to
do. I cleaned up the house last night, so laundry was all
there was left. Begrudgingly, I started it, all the
time wishing Snookums was here to do it for me.

Speaking of Snookums, we played e-mail tag for 5 hours
today. They don't have IM on the ship (never have and
never will, according to Snookums), so we just settled for
ping-ponging e-mails back and forth. He had holiday
routine all day, which meant he had a ton of free time on
his hands. I was so proud of how he used his time. He
worked on some of his qualifications (good boy!), worked
out (even better boy!) and wrote me. It was nice hearing
that little chime I get when a new e-mail comes in, every
minute or two. Eventually he had to go to watch, but it
was okay. I got to chat with him and he'll be pulling into
San Diego tomorrow, so he'll call me as soon as he can.
I'm not as sick with lonesomeness as I usually am when
Snookums is gone. I decided before he left that I was
going to be a little less co-dependant upon him. I wanted
to find my strength and enjoy the freedom of doing what I
want for a change, instead of always catering to his
wishes. Not that I don't enjoy doing that. But who doesn't
like doing whatever they want, for a change? The POW/MIA
run was very eye-opening and cathartic for me. It was
something I've never done before, would never have
imagined doing only 6 months ago, and it showed me so
much. I'm capable. I have abilities I don't give myself
credit for AND I can have a life outside of my family.
They aren't my ONLY reason for living. They're just one of
many reasons. I'm not going to shrivel up and die when my
children come of age and leave me behind. I'll have
discovered my true self by that point and I'll still be
young enough to embrace that self and evolve upon it in
ways I haven't thought of yet.

I've got a decision to make and I can't seem to decide. I
have two ears of sweet corn in the crisper of the fridge.
It's what I really want to eat. But, part of me is kind of
wanting a Boca Burger, too. Should I take the time to boil
the corn or nuke a Boca Burger? I shouldn't eat both, that
would be 506 calories and I've already had 700 today. I'm
not trying to starve myself, but if I want to lose weight,
I need to stay under 1,100 calories. That's my optimum
calorie intake to lose a pound a week (I'm trying to be
good, here. No starving, but it's really hard). I'm
tempted not to eat either and just have a cup of tea or
something, but 700 calories is something the old me would
strived for. Not the new and improved, more centered and
balanced me. I really want that corn. I'll have the corn.
Problem solved.

Did I mention the satin dress I'm wearing as Snookums'
WELCOME HOME dress? I think I did. Well, I tried it on
again today and it fits me even better than it did on
Wednesday (when I bought it)! It's a junior's 9/10 with
absolutely no stretch to it what-so-ever. I still can't
believe I'm in single dress sizes!!!!

Okay, I'm going to have that corn now. I'm starting to
feel the tell-tale signs of hunger. Rumbly tummy is
getting angry. Ciao!




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