Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2006-07-11 21:41:06 (UTC)

Change In Plans

Well, there's been a slight change in plans. Instead of
leaving today, like I'd intended to, I'll be leaving
tomorrow. Dad didn't seem to think I was emotionally ready
to leave and I'd have to agree with him. The thought of
returning to my eerily quiet home, with all the ghosts and
demons I ran away from, waiting for me to return, is a
frighteningly unsettling proposition. I'm just not ready
to face that reality just yet.

Dad is Buddhist. Which isn't so much a religion (even
though it is catagorized as one) as it is a way of being,
thinking and living. It's something (in my quest for
comfort and enlightenment) that I've considered pursuing
(Remember this conversation, Gen?) but haven't felt
convicted enough to go through with. So, Dad has given me
several books, shared his experiences over the past 30
years and I think I'll look into it. What have I got to
lose? My sanity? I think not.

I'll have to reschedule my therapy appointment on Thursday
seeing as how I won't be home by then. I feel ready to go
home, but there's something so comforting about being
here. Chris, Annie and Kiki keep me busy all day. Dad and
I philisophically connect (talk) in the evening, I SLEEP
all night, wake up and start the whole process over again.
It's been heaven. The only thing I miss is the familiarily
of my personal belongings, not living out of an overnight
bag and being able to get around without directions from a
12 year old. But other than that, I'd be perfectly happy
never going back to Washington. No offense, it's a great
state, but too much shit has happened to me there. I need
a fresh start, unfortunately, now is not the time for that
fresh start (Snookums is kinda stationed in Washington for
the next few years).

The children are getting restless, so I'd better get
going. I'm off to the pool. Ciao.




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