Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2006-02-19 03:39:55 (UTC)

My Narcotic Lullaby

Every now and then, I take a few moments to read the new
diaries (5 entries and under) that pop up on the front
page. I've seen a lot of diaries come and go and I've seen
a lot of people start off like I started off. Depressed,
lonely, unhappy, looking for an outlet. Sometimes I give
them feedback, let them know they aren't alone. Let them
know there's a light at the end of the tunnel. I feel like
an old pro at this diary thing, considering I've been
doing it everyday for the last 6 months. 6 months isn't
that long, but there's a lot of days inbetween then and
now and I've gotten a lot out. I feel all the better for
it. So, welcome newcomers. Welcome to your new addiction.

I slept long and hard last night. Snookums came home and
gave the girls' breakfast and I slept. Lulled to sleep by
my narcotic lullaby. It worries me slightly that I need
Vicodin (2 of them) to get to sleep, but the way I see it,
it's a small gamble to take in an effort to live a normal,
functioning life during the day. Eventually this whole
ordeal will be behind me and I won't need any help getting
to sleep. But, God do I sleep good. I had an "attack"
today (I'll explain why a little later) and since Snookums
was driving, I took a couple to kill the pain and ended up
passing out for 3 hours. I may have lost some time out of
the day, but that was 3 hours I wasn't in pain.

We finally got ourselves up and about by around noon. We
took the Impala in for some regular maintenance (oil
change and transmission flush). I firmly believe that
keeping up on the required maintenance of a vehicle is the
#1 way to ensure you never end up on the side of the road.
It's worked for me so far. The Impala is a 2004, so we
haven't had to do much with it, but I think I want to keep
it for awhile, so I'm taking good care of it now. Maybe it
will become a classic again.

While we waited for the car to get worked on, we walked
around Fred Meyer a bit. I got some pens and post-it notes
and Annie got some candy, but other than that we just
browsed around killing time. We're all shopped-out after
the flood of money we've had lately (pay raises, bonuses,
etc). I haven't been hardcore shopping in weeks. The last
major purchase I made was the white leather purse and that
was 2 weeks ago. I'm so proud of myself. It's really a
lovely feeling not wanting for anything. I realize how
blessed I am to be so comfortable. I wish everyone the
life I lead. It really is fabulous.

After the car was finished, Snookums decided he wanted to
go to the Chinese Buffet. This didn't sound like a good
idea to my poor ravaged body, but I love him (and Chinese
food) so I said okay. I tried to eat it, I enjoyed about
half a plate of it before my insides tied themselves into
knots. That's when I took the Vicodin. I don't usually
take them during the day, but I wasn't driving so, it
didn't matter. We came home afterwards, Snookums helped me
into bed and I woke up to the girls' being put to sleep. I
love my husband so much for taking care of me and picking
up my slack. Once I'm back at 100% I'm going to have to
find a way to make it up to him. I know he does it because
he loves me and his family, but he really is taking on a
lot of my responsibilities. He's such a good man.




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