Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2005-09-09 14:30:41 (UTC)

200, An Even Lovelier Number

I'm down again! I don't know what happened to me last
week, but my metabolism seems to have been given a
jumpstart. I stepped on the scale and was greeted by the
number 200! An even lovelier number than 205! Just
yesterday I was teetering between 202 and 201. When I
finally drop below 200, it will be a happy day. 196 is my
prepregnancy weight, so I'm only 4 pounds away from
getting rid of that. Then I'll have my already-fat-before-
pregnancy-fat to lose.

This morning, around 2am. I woke to the sickening
sensation of laying in something warm and wet. When I got
up, blood was running down my legs and there was a little
puddle in the bed. Luckily it wasn't too bad and I just
threw a towel over the spot, cleaned myself up and went
back to sleep. Snookums is grossed out by female
secretions (blood from "down there" and breastmilk) he's
such a baby. So, if I would have had to wake him up to
change the sheets, he wouldn't have been a happy camper
this morning. I don't know why I'm bleeding so much. Maybe
I should at least talk to a doctor. I'm positive the
geniuses at Naval Hospital are going to tell me its
nothing, it's normal, and it will go away on it's own. Why
should I even waste my time going to an appointment. I can
tell myself that at home. Just because the medical is
free, doesn't mean it's always a good thing. Naval
Hospital is understaffed and overworked on a regular
basis. Making the quality of care you can expect to
recieve, marginal at best. When I was in the hospital with
Kiki, we'd go 12 hours or more without seeing so much as
an orderly, until it was time for Kiki's antibiotics. Why
I'm getting into this now, I don't know. I think it's a
smoke screen and an excuse to keep me from seeing a
doctor. I just don't like the whole experience. The gown,
the stirrups, that thing that looks like a miniature jack,
they shove up inside you. I don't like the whole thing. I
went through it enough during my two pregnancies and the
pap smears Snookums drags me to every year.

I'm definately going for a walk today. My feet don't hurt
when I walk around the house on them, so maybe they won't
hurt if I walk up the street on them. Wishful thinking,
I'm guessing. I can feel that the skin in the blistered
areas seems to be a bit tougher now, so maybe I'll be
okay. I've got to get back into my routine. I miss my
walks, terribly. And now that the weather is changing back
to it's usual Washington shades of grey and chilly, the
weather is perfect for walking. Ciao, until later.




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