I cut myself

Welc0meXtoXmyXlife
2004-05-08 18:19:39 (UTC)

*how could someone degrate a person like that?!*

hey. ok, so josh left yesterday, and i really was glad he
left, so he could be with his family, but now, i wish he
was here, for certain personal reasons,
i won't say who it was, but i was in the basment after
josh left, with jamie and another person, and we were
watchin movies, and i fell asleep at like 7:30pm
and when i woke up, i was being touched, i wasn't sure
what was going on, so i pretended to be asleep for a
minute and i felt a hand slide up my shirt, and then back
down to my crotch...then i acted like i was waking up, and
they pulled their hand way from me real fast,
i told jamie as soon as the person left.
I don't know if i was in the wrong by pretending to be
asleep to see what they were doing, or for not saying
anything.
maybe, i'm just afraid of hurting the person's
feelings...or maybe i'm just weak. i dunno. i wish i could
tell josh. and i hope he doesn't get mad at me.
i mean, the person had been flirting with me,
b/c when we were smokin he and i were shot gunning it to
each other, and he kept getting real close to my
lips...but i'd push him away, everytime...so i figured
he'd realize i didn't want to do anything with him...god
i'm such a fucking retard, i should have left as soon as
josh did.
i'll tell him monday. but i'm not going back to the
basement till josh comes back monday.
well i'm all alone today, cleanin
the house...but i'm ok with being alone, i need some alone
time anyway...
I LOVE JOSH DICE!!!!!!!
Megan

*how could u do that to me. i thought u were my
friend. u should have realized i didn't wanna do anything
with you. i'm not sure if i can ever trust you again, you
really hurt me* ~you know who u are.




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